To be honest, my former friend is not a "bad" person. She really does have a good heart and is one of the kindest people I know, but over the years, her emotional, physical, and financial insecurities diminished her true self and she turned into someone she wasn't when we met 15 years ago. Therefore, knowing someone you love has the potential to be great, one tends to give them lots of leeway and chances to reach that potential. Unfortunately, her time has run out. It happens.

What some see as a "lashing out," others see as honesty in its rawest form. Sensitive people can't handle unpleasant truth unless it's wrapped in a soft place to land. I do not provide such a service.

A strong, decisive woman who knows herself and makes no apologies for her boundaries may be seen as narcissistic to someone who prefers her "presentation" and "tone" to be less forceful. Luckily for me, I am not moved by how anyone sees me and I carry no "intention" when I write. This is my art. It does what it does. Take it or leave it. None of it matters to me.

I am happy to be rid of my former friend, and to have made space to celebrate the true friendships in my life, which I cherish. With them, there are no unpleasant truths or heavy talks. We're all grown-ups who handle our shit and hold ourselves accountable. We help eachother, love one another, and reciprocate what we are given.

This feels good. This feels safe. This is where I will live. :)

Written by

3x NYT bestselling author. Pen name Karrine Steffans. Psych Major. Performance + Life Mastery Coach.

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